The Boules Bugle 2025
Winner of the Scurrilous Rag of the Year award for four years running.
Summer Club Playing Times - Dateline 21 - 01 - 2025
Members were polled at the Christmas lunch as to their preferred solution for resolving the problem of too many players turning up for a game on Tuesdays in summer time. The solution voted for was the two sessions option. Thus from the beginning of club summer time games, which this year start on 1st April, the following rules come into play..
The first session will run from 1.00 pm till 3.00 pm the FIRST 24 players to arrive will play. Anyone arriving after this time will have to wait till the second session starts which will be 3.30 pm till whenever. Of course you can opt to play at 3.30 anyway. The half hour gap between the two sessions is to allow a bit of socialising. There is nothing to stop someone who has played during the first session to also play in the second session to make up numbers if so required.
Sec Through to Final - Dateline 21 - 01 - 24
Despite a valiant defence, Hilary Thompson failed to hold off Beverley Harris who powered herself to a 13 - 8 victory before a crowd of two. She now meets the webmaster in the February final of the Chiller Thriller for the Norman Naff Memorial Trophy. There is no truth in the rumour that it is being renamed the Committee Trophy.
Wise Woman of Walhampton
Eunice Spice - she gives good advice - Dateline 17 - 01 - 25
This week Mrs.TK of Lyndhurst sent me a photograph of her nasty lump and asked for advice on the best way of getting rid of it. Well I can suggest a couple of possible solutions to her problem.
1. Go foraging for mushrooms, taking a somewhat cavalier attitude to all safety advice. Top tip; the red ones look really pretty. Bake the mushrooms into a pie, serve up and await results (do not eat the pie yourself)
2. Broaden your horizons by taking up a new challenge e.g. motor servicing.
You can practice on the family car. Start on some simple maintenance task. I would recommend adjusting the brakes. Trust your woman's instincts and don't waste money buying a Haynes Manual.
P.S. Don't get into the car if it is going to be driven (especially down hill)
Woodini Predicts - Dateline - 15 - 01 - 25
Greetings my Petanque Playing Pals! Apologies for the delay in publishing my first predictions for 2025 in this august journal but as I first predicted in May last year, I went down with a bought of influenza on new year's day. Happily thanks to Lemsip and some Night Nurse (especially the latter) I am now fully recovered. I gaze into my crystal ball, the veil lifts and I predict :-
1. The following number sequence 2, 14, 27, 28, 29, 49 will not win the national lottery jackpot this month.
2. This year, Southampton FC will not win the Premier League title.
That's all for now till February.
Ward Floored - Dateline 11 - 01 - 2025
Alec Martel, the current Scorcher Torture champ, made his bid for double bubble glory by defeating Simon Ward in the Chiller Thriller semi-final 13 - 3.
Naff Semi-finals Loom - Dateline 01 - 01 - 2025
This month will see the semi-finals of the Chiller Thriller competition as the last four (Hilary Thompson v Beverley Harris and Simon Ward v Alec Martel) battle it out for the honour of going through to the final and the chance of getting their hands on the much coveted Norman Naff Memorial Trophy.
Bugle Retains Title - Dateline 01 - 01 - 2025
We are proud to announce that despite very strong competition from The Wiggleford and District Allotment Herald with their salacious Forbidden Fruit of the Month page and scandalous Behind Closed Shed Doors column, your Bugle has once again won the Scurrilous Rag of the Year award.
Bugle Hires Top Columnists - Dateline 01 - 01 - 2025
Two new columnists join the Bugle this month. Woodini : Mystic and Seer whose predictions have never been known to be wrong. He is currently busy buffing his crystal balls (surely boules - ed) and will be making his first prognostications for the year later this month. He is joined by Eunice Spice the Wise Woman of Walhampton who is happy to give sage advice on your horticultural, medical, personal, sexual, sporting or what have you problems. She is currently putting a new ribbon into her Remmington